Divine, Safe & Open Relationships Start with You with Kim Coffin

Creating meaningful connections, whether in romantic partnerships, soul-level friendships, or with our children, requires vulnerability, openness, and a willingness to lean into discomfort. Today we are joined by Kim Coffin, certified trauma-informed sex, love, and relationship coach to talk about how cultivating intimacy begins with doing the inner work to connect with our own truth. Join us as we dive into conscious partnership, sex-positive parenting practices, and how we can maintain vulnerable relationships. 

Romantic Partnerships: Healing through Vulnerability and Trust

Romantic relationships are not only for companionship, they are also containers for deep healing. When we are in a long term relationship, our subconscious mind starts to think "oh I am safe now, I can bring up all of these old triggers and wounds". This is why healing your relationship with yourself can help support you in standing in your truth with your partner. 

How to Create Healthy, Intimate Partnerships 

Do Inner Work First: Emotional baggage from childhood or past relationships can easily sabotage a partnership if left unhealed. Kim shares how reconnecting with her truth, through practices like breathwork, self-pleasure, and emotional regulation, helped her leave toxic patterns behind and open to deeper love.

Communicate Even When It’s Hard: Vulnerability often feels uncomfortable, but it is essential for intimacy. For example, Kim reflects on moments when she voiced her fears of being judged. Naming these fears out loud gave her partner the opportunity to support her instead of pulling away.

Create Safety by Holding Space for Emotions: Healthy relationships provide space for each partner to express difficult emotions without fear of judgment. Instead of avoiding conflict, Kim and her partner have learned to lean in and share when they are triggered, building greater trust and a deeper connection.

 The journey to creating a thriving partnership is not always smooth. Healing within a relationship often requires navigating discomfort and old patterns but when both partners are willing to grow together, the intimacy becomes more fulfilling over time.

Soulmate Connections: What Are They and How Do We Recognize Them?

Soulmates are people with who we share a deep emotional connection with. They are relationships that evoke a sense of familiarity, as if we’ve known each other for lifetimes. These connections can take many forms, appearing not just in romantic relationships but also with friends, family members, and even our children. Kim describes her current romantic relationship as one of these rare connections, saying it felt like the universe “dropped her partner right into her lap” after she fully aligned with her truth and desires.

How to Identify a Soulmate Connection

A Strong Sense of Recognition: When you meet a soulmate, there’s often a deep sense of knowing, like you’ve met them before or were meant to find each other.

Transformative Growth: These connections tend to push us toward personal growth, even when they are challenging. Kim explains that her new partner came into her life during a pivotal time, helping her heal father wounds and build trust with the masculine.

Alignment through Timing: Astrology lovers will appreciate Kim’s insight that certain life events and relationships may be written in the stars. Using tools like the Pattern app, she was able to identify her connection with her partner as a “vertex bond” (a relationship destined to spark major transformation). 

 Recognizing a soulmate connection requires trusting your intuition and saying “no” to relationships that no longer align with your growth. As Kim emphasizes, when you follow your desires and release toxic dynamics, you create space for these powerful connections to enter your life.

Maintaining Vulnerable & Open Relationships: The Key to Long-Term Intimacy

While falling in love is exciting, maintaining long-term intimacy requires consistent work. Jenny and Kim agree that the secret to lasting passion is vulnerability. However, staying open in relationships, especially after years together, can feel scary, as old wounds and fears of rejection may resurface.

Tips for Staying Open in Long-Term Relationships

Name Your Triggers in the Moment: Kim describes how she and her partner have learned to notice small signs of activation, such as a shift in body language, and name them before they grow into bigger issues.

Lean Into Discomfort: Vulnerability can feel uncomfortable, but it deepens intimacy. When you voice your fears of rejection or judgment, you invite your partner to meet you with compassion.

Create an Emotional “Container”: Holding space for each other’s emotional needs prevents resentment from building. Kim explains that rather than projecting her fears onto her partner, she takes responsibility for her emotions while allowing him to support her in healthy ways.

Healthy relationships require continuous work, but the rewards are worth it. Jenny and Kim emphasize that long-term intimacy leads to richer, more satisfying sex lives, as emotional closeness feeds physical passion. By staying vulnerable and committed to growth, couples can build relationships where both partners feel fully seen and valued.

Talking to Kids about Pleasure, Bodies & Sexuality

For many parents, talking to children about bodies and pleasure feels daunting, especially if they didn’t receive open communication about these topics growing up. But creating open, shame-free conversations with kids is essential for their emotional and sexual development. Below are practical ways to approach these discussions with confidence and compassion.

How to Talk to Kids About Sexuality & Bodies

Start Early: Use proper names for body parts from a young age to normalize these conversations. Kids who grow up with shame-free language around their bodies are more likely to develop healthy attitudes toward sexuality.

Be Proactive: Don’t wait for your kids to ask questions. As Kim says, “Teaching your kids about bodies and boundaries is no different than teaching them to cook—don't wait for them to come to you.” Bring up these topics in casual, non-pressured ways.

Create Safe Spaces for Conversation: A great place to initiate discussions is in the car because kids feel more comfortable talking when they don’t have to make eye contact.

How to Handle Pushback from Teens

Keep Showing Up: Even when teens push parents away with “Ugh, Mom!” moments, they still need your guidance. Kim suggests continuing to initiate conversations and share resources, knowing that curiosity often outweighs embarrassment.

Leave Books and Tools Out: Subtly placing books about bodies or pleasure where kids can find them is a great way to spark curiosity. Kim recommends titles like Pussy: A Reclamation and Woman’s Anatomy of Arousal to help kids learn about pleasure in healthy ways.

Model Openness: Kids learn by observing. If you model healthy boundaries and openness about pleasure in your own life, they’ll feel more comfortable coming to you when they have questions.

The goal is not to give kids all the answers at once, but to create a foundation of trust so they know they can always come to you. As Kim reflects, the openness she modeled with her children has allowed them to develop healthy relationships with their bodies and partners as they grew older.

Living Authentically in Every Relationship

Whether we’re building romantic partnerships, recognizing soulmates, or raising children, one thing is clear - meaningful connections require us to show up in our truth. The key to intimacy lies in embracing vulnerability—both with others and within ourselves. By doing the inner work to heal past wounds, practicing open communication, and modeling emotional regulation, we create relationships that are sustainable, nourishing, and aligned with who we truly are. And as Kim emphasizes, it’s never too late to cultivate these practices, whether you’re starting a new partnership or deepening your connection with your children. 

When we stop hiding and start living authentically, we inspire those around us to do the same. Whether it’s initiating a conversation with your partner about a fear, encouraging your teen to talk about bodies, or welcoming a soulmate connection, every relationship offers an opportunity for growth and transformation.